I pick up the boys from school. I load them both into the car and we set off toward home.
They ignore me. I’m OK with that.
The Kaiser: You like dragons, Hayden?
Hayden: Yeah, I like dragons. You like dragons?
The Kaiser: Yeah, I like the dragons. Dragons have fire that comes out they nose.
Hayden: Hahahaha. Fire comes out they nose.
The Kaiser: Mahahaha. Yeah. Fire comes out they nose!
I turn up the music.
The Kaiser: Mama, turn it down!
The Kaiser: We needs quiet.
I turn down the music. I actually turn down the fucking music. And again, whaaaaa?
Hayden: What else they do?
The Kaiser: They put the fire on your face. They put the fire in your ears.
Hayden: Hahahaha. They put the fire in your eyebrow.
The Kaiser: Hayeah. They do.